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Joke: Watch out for the VIRUS!!!

*AT&T Virus: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you're getting with them as your phone company.

*MCI Virus: Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T Virus.

*Paul Revere Virus: This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack--once if by LAN, twice if by C:>.

*Politically Correct Virus: Never calls itself a "virus," but instead refers to itself as an "electronic micro-organism."

*Government Economist Virus: Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.

*Federal Bureaucrat Virus: Divides your hard disk into hundreds of little units, each of which does practically nothing, but all of which claim to be the most important part of your computer.

*PBS (Public Broadcasting TV) Virus: Your programs stop every few minutes to ask for money.

*Elvis Virus: Your computer gets fat, slow and lazy, and then self destructs, only to resurface at shopping malls and service stations across rural America.

*Nike Virus: Just does it.

*Star Trek Virus: Invades your system in places where no virus has gone before.

*Health Care Virus: Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends you a bill for $4500.00.

*Los Angeles Police Department Virus: It claims it feels threatened by other files on your PC and erases them in "self defense."

*Richard Nixon Virus: Says, "I am not a virus!"

*Adam and Eve Virus: Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.

*Airline Virus: You're in Chicago, but your data is in Singapore.

Use your virus scan soon...don't let any of these viruses happen to your PC!

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